Trapped in the Bathroom for 30 Minutes

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help me, R Kelly

FROM THE DESK OF: Deo

The doorknob to my bathroom wouldn’t turn so I did what any man would do: I turned it harder. I had just finished showering so I was still wet, eager to get out of the bathroom and make coffee. I turned as hard as I could, because you know, brute strength always solves problems—but then the damn knob just… fell. Now I didn’t have a way of turning the door. I was trapped in the bathroom, R-Kelly style. Continue reading “Trapped in the Bathroom for 30 Minutes”

Post-Apocalyptic Movies Reflect The State of The Union

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This is getting easier to imagine

FROM THE DESK OF: Deo

In the same way that nightmares serve an evolutionary purpose of mentally preparing us for real world dangers, I believe that apocalyptic movies also serve a similar function for society: namely, they prepare us for the worst. This may explain a correlation of historical events to the rise of apocalyptic movies.

Continue reading “Post-Apocalyptic Movies Reflect The State of The Union”

Unqualified Bullet Points On the Election

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FROM THE DESK OF: Deo

I’m still trying (and will be for a long time) to gather all my thoughts on what just happened. Until I can fully grasp all of these things, I’m going to just start bullet pointing some of my unqualified thoughts.

Continue reading “Unqualified Bullet Points On the Election”

Things I’ve Read While Pretending to Work

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newyorker.com

FROM THE DESK OF: Deo

For some people November is a slow month. In my job, we have a name for it: No-Work November. There are obvious and good reasons for this: along with the non-existent workflow, there are also days off like Election Day, Veterans Day, and Thanksgiving. That means November is a month with some serious downtime to spend on expanding your gut as preparation to take more food in the upcoming holidays; getting to know your coworkers better by throwing things at them when no-one is looking; and of course finding some interesting things to read. Continue reading “Things I’ve Read While Pretending to Work”

Sightseeing FiDi Without Ever Stepping Outside

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Brookfield Plaza

FROM THE DESK OF: Deo

What I’m most impressed about from the completion of the World Trade Center Transportation Hub isn’t that it’s this awe-inspiring architectural wonder with a price tag of $4-billion, but that it essentially links the Financial District (FiDi) from one end to another, allowing pedestrians to walk through the width of Downtown Manhattan entirely indoors. That means that when it’s too cold, too hot, too wet, too frozen, too whatever outside—you can still sightsee (or in my case, just get to work) through Downtown without ever stepping outside. Continue reading “Sightseeing FiDi Without Ever Stepping Outside”

Guide to Staying in On a Rainy Saturday

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not leaving here

FROM THE DESK OF: Deo

I had plans for a lunch date but it has been rain-checked. Outside, it’s cold and sad—yet I am oddly relieved. I get to do what I haven’t done in a long time: just stay inside and do nothing for the day. Here is my tiny guide to staying in bed or the couch:

Continue reading “Guide to Staying in On a Rainy Saturday”

The Rise and Fall of Trump as Explained by Game Theory

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Nope!

FROM THE DESK OF: DEO

Like pretty much all of you, I can’t take my eyes of this train wreck otherwise known as the Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump. On a daily basis, I often find myself typing “trump” on Google news eagerly awaiting what terrible thing he will do next to further ruin his candidacy. Continue reading “The Rise and Fall of Trump as Explained by Game Theory”